Kurt Cobain

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Lore & Background

Cobain's life was marked by intense physical pain and emotional struggle. He suffered from chronic bronchitis, an undiagnosed stomach condition causing severe agony, and battled alcoholism and drug addiction. During Nirvana's 1991 European tour, the pain became so unbearable he told friends heroin was "the only thing that's saving me from shooting myself right now." His family history included two uncles who died by firearm suicide, and his cousin Beverly noted diagnoses of ADHD and bipolar disorder. In March 1994, following a hospitalization in Rome for an accidental overdose of Rohypnol and alcohol, he entered the Exodus Recovery Center in Los Angeles. However, on April 1, just two days later, he scaled a six-foot wall to leave the facility. His friend Dylan Carlson noted Cobain asked him to buy a shotgun for "self-protection" around this time.

In Their Own Story

On March 25, 1994, an intervention regarding his drug use was arranged by his wife, Courtney Love. Bassist Krist Novoselic recalled seeing Cobain in the days leading up to this event as "really quiet," estranged from all relationships and unable to connect with anyone. When Novoselic offered to buy him dinner, he unintentionally drove Cobain to his dealer, who was right there; Novoselic observed that Cobain "wanted to get fucked up into oblivion" because "he wanted to die." Drummer Dave Grohl later reflected on the recording of "You Know You're Right," stating it was not a pleasant time: "Kurt was unwell. Then he was well. Then he was unwell. The last year of the band was tough." On April 8, a VECA Electric worker installing security lighting discovered Cobain's body in the greenhouse above his garage. The worker initially thought he was asleep until seeing blood from his ear and finding a suicide note with a pen stuck through it inside a flowerpot.

Reader's Guide

The official investigation confirmed Cobain died by suicide using a Remington Model 11 20-gauge shotgun, which had been legally purchased for him by Dylan Carlson at Stan Baker's Gun Shop in Seattle. The King County medical examiner noted puncture wounds on the inside of both elbows and found the shotgun inverted on his chest with his left hand wrapped around the barrel. Toxicological tests revealed a morphine level of 1.52 milligrams per liter, with evidence of Valium present. Randall Baselt described the heroin concentration as "high" but noted its lethality depended on habituation. In March 2014, the Seattle Police Department developed four rolls of film from the scene, depicting the corpse more clearly than previous Polaroids; these were released in 2016 despite requests to reopen the case. The suicide note concluded with the line: "It's better to burn out than to fade away." Cobain was cremated, and his wife divided his ashes, keeping some in a teddy bear and an urn while taking another portion to the Namgyal Buddhist Monastery in Ithaca, New York.

Did You Know?

• Cobain died on approximately April 5, 1994, but his body was not discovered until April 8.
• The shotgun used in Cobain's death was purchased by his friend Dylan Carlson because Cobain feared police would seize it if bought in his own name.
• In March 2014, the Seattle Police Department developed four rolls of film from the scene that had been left in an evidence vault for 20 years.
• Cobain's cousin Beverly stated he was diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar disorder and noted a family history of suicide by firearm.
• The Seattle Post-Intelligencer reported on April 14, 1994, that toxicological tests showed Cobain had Valium and morphine in his system.